Tom Brady: Gizzmaster

Tom has cum through in the clutch again...Rumors have been swirling all day that Mr. Brady has spread his super spunk once again...this time supposedly impregnating Gisele.

Tom, NEWSFLASH: You can have SEX without procreating. Buy a rubber...or two. It's evident you have some sort of SUPER SPERM, so cage it up kid.

Not to mention you keep adding to your already insane "what have you done with your life?" factor that makes us regular fella feel useless. Let's see...3 Super Bowl Rings and 2 Super Bowl MVP Titles before your 28th birthday. The list of woman who have been in your bed is longer than the entire Cincinatti Bengals rap sheet. And now it appears you've dropped your super human seed on not only uber-hot Bridget Moynhan but also the hottest model on the planet, Gisele.

Thanks for making me feel good about myself, AGAIN, Tom....

Tom Brady: Baby Daddy

Way to go Tom. First you launch Bridget’s old ass to upgrade to Gisele.

That's understandable. Who wouldn’t want to dip their wick in the hottest piece of poon on the planet? I can cope with your decision.

But to do it when Bridget is Pregnant with your child?

Dick move man, Dick move.

PS: You play in the NFL, not the NBA. Man up.